4 Tips to Build Powerful, Referral-Generating Relationships – #TomFerryShow

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Technology makes our lives easier, no doubt.

But are we ignoring the personal connections that are so critical to our long-term success?

In an age of buying online leads, communicating with clients through texts or occasionally commenting on a past client’s Facebook post to keep in touch, we’re in danger of losing the real, emotional connections so vital to building and maintaining relationships.

Those relationships are some of the most valuable assets we have.

If I had to choose between leads or relationships, for me it’s an easy choice.

So I’m asking you to flash back to a simpler time, dig deep and make that extra effort to forge strong, personal bonds with your clients.

To help you get started, here are four tips on building powerful, referral-generating relationships…


Tip No. 1: A Personal “Happy Birthday!”

Facebook notifies you whenever a friend has a birthday, right?

But then what?

Do you ignore it? Post a quick birthday note? Wish them Happy Birthday over Messenger?


Here’s how you create that connection and differentiate yourself:

Pick up the phone, call and wish them a Happy Birthday personally!

Imagine the impact that simple act will make…

“My Realtor called to say Happy Birthday today! I was blown away!” they’ll tell their friends.

Talk about a difference maker…

To make it even more effective, use this script:

“I know you’re getting inundated with phone calls today, but I just had to reach out and say Happy Birthday.”

It’s simple, quick, and will make a lasting impact.



Tom Ferry - Success Summit


Tip No. 2: Call Your Database 4X Annually

Yep, your whole database. Everyone.

Divide the total number of people in your database by 90-day increments, and that’s how many calls you need to make daily.

But Tom, what am I calling about?

You’re just calling to check in. To make it easy, use the F.O.R.D. method and ask them about their:

  • Family
  • Occupation
  • Recreation
  • Dreams

That last one seems heavy, but what if you’re the only person who asks them about their dreams all year. Think that elevates you in their minds? Of course it does! They know you care about them, and that makes a monumental difference in how they perceive you.


Tip No. 3: Invite Them Places

How do you feel when you get invited somewhere?

It feels great, right? You feel liked. You feel wanted.

So whether it’s a community event, a social event or even just a Mega Open House, call up people in your database and invite them to come along.

The more you invest yourself in relationships, go deep with people and bring them value, the more you’ll stay top of mind and the more referrals and business you’ll receive.


Tip No. 4: A Thoughtful Touch-Base Every 90 Days

Every 90 days, send everyone in your database a personal text or “me-mail” not about business, but just to follow up from your calls. Ask about something meaningful they shared with you during your phone call, or just check to see their progress on their dream.

Those little touches make a relationship special and will keep you top of mind.


So what’s your verdict: With these four tips, do you see how relationships are more valuable than leads? Answer below and share your own tips for making people feel special and forging relationships.



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